Strong Woman
So what makes a strong woman? Ask a dozen different people, and you'll probably get just as many answers. I think women are made strong by design, truthfully. We were created to be supportive. We love richly, feel deeply, and tend to protect the people we care about like a mother bear. Our bodies go through enormous changes and incredible amounts of stress and pain just to bring a child into the world, and yet many of us choose to do it more than once. Strength is, to some extent, built into who we are.
Sometimes as you're researching family tree, you see glimpses of strength in the women of the family that are hidden in the facts of their everyday lives. I have lots of women like that in my tree, and I am always looking for ways to try and learn more about them. One ancestor raised more than 20 children, and all but one of them were hers. One ancestor raised all of her own children, and then proceeded to raise a number of her grandchildren when circumstances didn't allow the parents to do it. One woman sent her husband and three of her sons off to fight for the Confederacy during the Civil War, not knowing if she would ever see them again. The examples are numerous.
One woman that I see a lot of strength in is one that I really don't know very much about right now. I never got to meet her, because she died several years before I met and married her grandson. I'd like to learn more about her, though, and I've gradually been trying to gather more information about her and her life.
The name she was given was Pearl.
Pearl Marie Mitchell was born on October 5, 1910. Her parents were Groce Golden Mitchell and Rosa Lee Williams. Groce was a handsome young man who married Miss Rosa Lee Williams (also called Rosie) at the age of 18 on May 24, 1909 in rural Muhlenberg County, Kentucky. She was a little more than a year older than him. Golden (which seems to be what he went by) was working hard to support his new wife. Their marriage certificate listed his occupation as "miner", meaning that he worked in the coal mines that were and are so prominent in that part of Kentucky. It was hard, dirty, dangerous work, but it provided at least some kind of a living for folks that were living in a county that contained many poor people. The 1910 census lists him as a "general farmer" living on a rented farm, so I don't know if he had temporarily given up mining, or if he was farming as a way to supplement the family income.
The young couple began their family in 1910 with the birth of their little girl named Pearl. It would be interesting to know what led them to choose that name ... it was not one that had showed up in the family before. Their little family now numbered three, and things seemed to be going along in all the normal ways. I'm sure they were looking forward to what the future held for them, as so many young families do. The photo below shows Golden, Rosie and Pearl. From the apparent age of Pearl, I would guess the photo was probably taken about 1913.
Unfortunately, things did not go along as smoothly as they might have planned, because Rosie developed tuberculosis. One article from the University of Virginia states that tuberculosis, during this time period, was "the leading cause of death in the United States, and one of the most feared diseases in the world." It was a disease that could be spread through coughs, sneezes, and other such means, and it had a tendency to thrive where conditions were crowded and dirty. The small towns surrounding a coal mine were susceptible because the coal dust in the air so often created breathing issues, which in turn caused coughing, etc. We don't know where the young mother got tuberculosis, but we do know that in those days it was often a death sentence. Rosie died in January of 1915. She had been married a little less than six years. Little Pearl was motherless at the age of 4.
I don't know how long Rosie was ill. It is possible she was already sick when the family photo was taken. As her life neared its end, though, a woman came in to help with Pearl and other household chores. Her name was Ada Wiggins Rhodes, a divorcee of about 20 years old. Golden and Pearl did not live alone long, for Golden married Ada in March, only two months after Rosie's death. So the little girl went from having a dreadfully sick Mama, to having lost her Mama, to having a new Mama, all within a short period of time. Perhaps, because of her young age, she didn't pay much attention to it all. But sometimes I wonder.
Nine months later, little Pearl's life changed again. Golden and Ada were blessed with a baby boy on December 6, 1915 that they named Groce. And then, just a few years later, sickness came again. In 1918, according to family members, Golden got an ear infection. Whether he was not able to get to a doctor, or whether there was not much they could do about it in 1918, the infection worsened until Golden ended up the hospital. He died there from septicemia (blood poisoning) on March 21,1918. Pearl was 7.
In September of that same year, her stepmother Ada remarried. Whether Pearl had been living with her stepmother until that time is unclear, but the 1920 census shows that 9 year old Pearl is living with her maternal Grandmother, Ora Jane Williams, and it is quite possible that she went to live with her Grandmother about this time. Ora's husband, Lovelace O. Williams, was still living when the census was taken in January, but was ill and had been admitted to the Western State Hospital, leaving 48-year old Ora to care for herself, the 14-year old son that was still at home, the farm they owned, and now 9-year old Pearl.
Grandpa Lovelace died in the hospital in February 1920.
Two years later, in June 1922, Grandma Ora died as well, leaving 11-year old Pearl adrift again.
Pearl doesn't surface in regular records again until February 1929, when she married Everett Almon Legate. She was 18. He was a 19-year old coal miner, who had been working in the mines since the tender age of 9. Their marriage bond lists Bryant Lee as surety, or bondsman. William Bryant Lee was her uncle by marriage ... the husband of her Aunt Minnie, who was Rosie's sister. Perhaps Pearl had been staying with them before she married. I have not found any official record appointing a guardian for her after the death of her Grandmother, so perhaps it was just something that was taken care of within the family. That is not uncommon.
It seemed the tragedies in Pearl's life were beginning to turn around. She met and married a man she loved in 1929, they had a son they named Benton in 1930. Wasn't life good?
In 1934, Pearl was expecting again, and I'm sure that as she went into labor that October day in 1934 the couple was expectantly waiting to see if the child was a boy or a girl. Her labor was more prolonged and difficult than anyone expected. The baby just wouldn't come ... it was too large for Pearl to deliver, and in those days there were not other options. In desperation, the doctor began using forceps to try and get the baby out and save Pearl. Finally, a baby girl was delivered, but the trauma had been too much for her to survive. Everett and Pearl named her Gilda Ray, and buried her the next day. It was nearly three years before another child came along.
But there were more children. A girl in 1937, another girl in 1939. a boy in 1942. In 1945, Pearl delivered twin girls, but one of them was stillborn. In 1947, their youngest daughter was born.
She was a fairly quiet woman, according to family members. Only about 5'2" tall, but she was quite capable of standing up for herself if needed. I look at this woman's life and I wonder how anyone could manage to go through so much loss and come out on the other side. But she lived in a time and a place where life was just hard. You dealt with things because you had to, and you made the best life you could out of what you had. Pearl died on her birthday, October 5, 1996.
The family members that I have talked to about her remember her with great fondness. And I am continuing to gather stories about her life, to gain a little more insight into what made her such a strong woman.
Sometimes as you're researching family tree, you see glimpses of strength in the women of the family that are hidden in the facts of their everyday lives. I have lots of women like that in my tree, and I am always looking for ways to try and learn more about them. One ancestor raised more than 20 children, and all but one of them were hers. One ancestor raised all of her own children, and then proceeded to raise a number of her grandchildren when circumstances didn't allow the parents to do it. One woman sent her husband and three of her sons off to fight for the Confederacy during the Civil War, not knowing if she would ever see them again. The examples are numerous.
One woman that I see a lot of strength in is one that I really don't know very much about right now. I never got to meet her, because she died several years before I met and married her grandson. I'd like to learn more about her, though, and I've gradually been trying to gather more information about her and her life.
The name she was given was Pearl.
Pearl Marie Mitchell was born on October 5, 1910. Her parents were Groce Golden Mitchell and Rosa Lee Williams. Groce was a handsome young man who married Miss Rosa Lee Williams (also called Rosie) at the age of 18 on May 24, 1909 in rural Muhlenberg County, Kentucky. She was a little more than a year older than him. Golden (which seems to be what he went by) was working hard to support his new wife. Their marriage certificate listed his occupation as "miner", meaning that he worked in the coal mines that were and are so prominent in that part of Kentucky. It was hard, dirty, dangerous work, but it provided at least some kind of a living for folks that were living in a county that contained many poor people. The 1910 census lists him as a "general farmer" living on a rented farm, so I don't know if he had temporarily given up mining, or if he was farming as a way to supplement the family income.
The young couple began their family in 1910 with the birth of their little girl named Pearl. It would be interesting to know what led them to choose that name ... it was not one that had showed up in the family before. Their little family now numbered three, and things seemed to be going along in all the normal ways. I'm sure they were looking forward to what the future held for them, as so many young families do. The photo below shows Golden, Rosie and Pearl. From the apparent age of Pearl, I would guess the photo was probably taken about 1913.
Unfortunately, things did not go along as smoothly as they might have planned, because Rosie developed tuberculosis. One article from the University of Virginia states that tuberculosis, during this time period, was "the leading cause of death in the United States, and one of the most feared diseases in the world." It was a disease that could be spread through coughs, sneezes, and other such means, and it had a tendency to thrive where conditions were crowded and dirty. The small towns surrounding a coal mine were susceptible because the coal dust in the air so often created breathing issues, which in turn caused coughing, etc. We don't know where the young mother got tuberculosis, but we do know that in those days it was often a death sentence. Rosie died in January of 1915. She had been married a little less than six years. Little Pearl was motherless at the age of 4.
I don't know how long Rosie was ill. It is possible she was already sick when the family photo was taken. As her life neared its end, though, a woman came in to help with Pearl and other household chores. Her name was Ada Wiggins Rhodes, a divorcee of about 20 years old. Golden and Pearl did not live alone long, for Golden married Ada in March, only two months after Rosie's death. So the little girl went from having a dreadfully sick Mama, to having lost her Mama, to having a new Mama, all within a short period of time. Perhaps, because of her young age, she didn't pay much attention to it all. But sometimes I wonder.
Nine months later, little Pearl's life changed again. Golden and Ada were blessed with a baby boy on December 6, 1915 that they named Groce. And then, just a few years later, sickness came again. In 1918, according to family members, Golden got an ear infection. Whether he was not able to get to a doctor, or whether there was not much they could do about it in 1918, the infection worsened until Golden ended up the hospital. He died there from septicemia (blood poisoning) on March 21,1918. Pearl was 7.
In September of that same year, her stepmother Ada remarried. Whether Pearl had been living with her stepmother until that time is unclear, but the 1920 census shows that 9 year old Pearl is living with her maternal Grandmother, Ora Jane Williams, and it is quite possible that she went to live with her Grandmother about this time. Ora's husband, Lovelace O. Williams, was still living when the census was taken in January, but was ill and had been admitted to the Western State Hospital, leaving 48-year old Ora to care for herself, the 14-year old son that was still at home, the farm they owned, and now 9-year old Pearl.
Grandpa Lovelace died in the hospital in February 1920.
Two years later, in June 1922, Grandma Ora died as well, leaving 11-year old Pearl adrift again.
Pearl doesn't surface in regular records again until February 1929, when she married Everett Almon Legate. She was 18. He was a 19-year old coal miner, who had been working in the mines since the tender age of 9. Their marriage bond lists Bryant Lee as surety, or bondsman. William Bryant Lee was her uncle by marriage ... the husband of her Aunt Minnie, who was Rosie's sister. Perhaps Pearl had been staying with them before she married. I have not found any official record appointing a guardian for her after the death of her Grandmother, so perhaps it was just something that was taken care of within the family. That is not uncommon.
It seemed the tragedies in Pearl's life were beginning to turn around. She met and married a man she loved in 1929, they had a son they named Benton in 1930. Wasn't life good?
In 1934, Pearl was expecting again, and I'm sure that as she went into labor that October day in 1934 the couple was expectantly waiting to see if the child was a boy or a girl. Her labor was more prolonged and difficult than anyone expected. The baby just wouldn't come ... it was too large for Pearl to deliver, and in those days there were not other options. In desperation, the doctor began using forceps to try and get the baby out and save Pearl. Finally, a baby girl was delivered, but the trauma had been too much for her to survive. Everett and Pearl named her Gilda Ray, and buried her the next day. It was nearly three years before another child came along.
But there were more children. A girl in 1937, another girl in 1939. a boy in 1942. In 1945, Pearl delivered twin girls, but one of them was stillborn. In 1947, their youngest daughter was born.
She was a fairly quiet woman, according to family members. Only about 5'2" tall, but she was quite capable of standing up for herself if needed. I look at this woman's life and I wonder how anyone could manage to go through so much loss and come out on the other side. But she lived in a time and a place where life was just hard. You dealt with things because you had to, and you made the best life you could out of what you had. Pearl died on her birthday, October 5, 1996.
The family members that I have talked to about her remember her with great fondness. And I am continuing to gather stories about her life, to gain a little more insight into what made her such a strong woman.
Women have a much more intimate relationship with pain than men do. The Bible may refer to them as the weaker vessel but that certainly is to be applied In specificity. I was talking with Pauline about how Bob looked like he was in a lot of pain but he still showed up for worship. She said “He’s a man.” I thought she was saying what a tough guy he was being. I was wrong. She explained further, “Men can’t handle pain.” My eyes were opened.
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